The Dark Times

hope (3)Now I’m not one to constantly dwell on the negative but lets face it as all you multi parents out there can no doubt relate to the moments where things don’t seem to be so wonderful.  Sleep deprivation has a way of making a usually smiling happy individual into a psychopathic lunatic that shouldn’t be allowed to function in society.  Add this into the mix of being a mum to twin babies and God help us all.

The early days seem to be a bit of a faded distant memory although it really wasn’t that long ago that I, along with my husband, was attempting to function on 4 hours of broken sleep.  For the first couple of months I literally couldn’t cope with going to the shops because when running just on Adrenalin the stress of people and noise was too much for my body and mind to handle.  Somehow my husband also had to work after helping out with the twins during the night.

I had many times where I would just cry after feeling a state of panic as to how I could possibly handle the babies.  It would generally hit me around early to mid afternoon as I felt my small stores of energy dwindle away and that feeling of just running on empty.  Logically I knew that this time would pass but it just seemed to be so far away and unrealistic.

This was the time that I would regularly surf the net to find any tips that may help to have the babies sleep longer and any encouragement that this stage would all be over soon. Being part of a parents of multiples playgroup and Facebook page was a dim light to me, a glimmer of hope and source of strength in the darkness that I was feeling.  I was reassured by other parents that it would pass before I know it and that things truly would get easier.

Well fast forward 6 months and I along with my twins have survived so far.  There are still the usual ups and downs but I can honestly say that the good times outweigh the hard times. Now that the twins sleep through the night I find it so much easier but still feel it in those times where their sleep routine regresses.

Although it is getting easier there are still those times where they are teething, tired, grizzly, inconsolable or just not feeling well that I struggle….I want to provide comfort and my undivided attention to them both but it’s impossible when I’m on my own.

Then there are the times where I feel like the most blessed woman in the world.  Their cute little faces, the way they notice each other and adore me…I am their world.

Relish every moment xxx



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